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While it’s common knowledge that boys play with themselves from the moment puberty hits, female masturbation is often seen as a taboo subject. So, before we go any further let’s get one thing straight: masturbation is perfectly normal, everyone else is doing it, and you should too.
‘Masturbation is the stimulation of one’s genitals with the goal being pleasure, leading to orgasm,’ says Sex and Relationship Expert Annabelle Knight. ‘It is a hugely important part of human sexuality and helps us to discover which techniques and methods work best for us.’
Is masturbation bad for you?
Masturbation is categorically NOT bad for you. Pleasuring yourself comes with a wealth of proven health benefits. Masturbating, like any sexual activity, releases endorphins that promote a sense of relaxation and reduces stress. The calming effects of masturbation can also help you sleep better, and can even reduce the pain associated with menstruation.
What’s more, masturbation helps flush out bacteria from the cervix, reducing the chances of urinary tract infections AND it makes sex better by helping you discover what turns you on.
What are the benefits of masturbation?
Masturbation is good for you in a number of ways. ‘Firstly, it helps you learn about your own body in a physiological sense,’ says Knight. ‘You get to know what is ‘normal’ for you and it helps you to spot any changes that may need attention. It is also great for learning about your own sexuality and what kind of stimulation you prefer.
‘It’s also great for your mental health as when you climax your body releases a whole host of feel-good chemicals known to help fight stress. It’s also good for your physical health too, people that regularly climax sleep better, have less headaches and have fewer issues when it comes to all-round genital health.’
Are there different types of female orgasm?
The female orgasm comes in all shapes and size and varies from person to person. If you can’t achieve orgasm in the ways we suggest, or something we haven’t listed here gets you off, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Experiment to work out what is best for you and, most importantly, what makes you feel good.
‘The orgasm is a very difficult thing to study, it is different for everyone and no two are completely identical,’ says Knight. ‘We also have to take in to account not just our body’s physical response but also our emotional response as well.’
? The Clitoral orgasm: This is achieved through direct and continuous stimulation of the clitoris only. This can be through manual masturbation, oral stimulation or the use of a sex toy.
? The G spot orgasm: This occurs through stimulation of the vagina and the sensitive spot within. Not all women can find this spot and it differs greatly in size and sensitivity. Curve your fingers in a ‘come hither’ motion to find yours, or use a specially designed G-spot toy with a curved tip for an easier experience.
? The blended orgasm: This is where you climax simultaneously through G-spot and clitoral stimulation. Missionary with a partners is the best position for this as your chances of stimulating both at the same time are increased.
Knight also recommends a vibrating love ring. ‘These rings sit at the base of the penis and boast an external clitoral stimulator that vibrates. This takes all the guesswork out and does the hard work for you.’
There are many ways you can reach your sexual peak, alone or with a partner. ‘Around one per cent of women can orgasm through nipple stimulation alone,’ says Knight. ‘The best way to discover your preferred way to climax is to experiment and play.’
How to masturbate: getting started
If you’re new to masturbation, welcome to the party! Sit back, relax and enjoy yourself. It’s YOUR time and this is all about YOU. Knight offers the following solo-sex tips:
❤️ If you’ve never experienced an orgasm then try to relax, as stress and anxiety are poison when it comes to sexual happiness.
? It’s a good idea to try to take the pressure to orgasm off and see masturbation as a worthwhile endeavour in itself. Once you and the space you’re using is nice and relaxed you can begin.
? Start by using your fingers to apply a gentle pressure to the external parts of your genitals and work your way around. You will soon find out which parts you like to be stimulated and which don’t work as well for you. Lube helps!
? Lots of women like to masturbate by solely stimulating the external parts, while others prefer internal stimulation or a mix of both. The best thing you can do is experiment over time and discover what works best for you.
? You may wish to try masturbation with a sex toy, by watching erotic films or reading a romance novel. The great thing about masturbation is its aim is pleasure and the pleasure is all for you.
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